12 Lessons from 2020
December 31, 2020
Raise your hand if you feel like a completely different person now compared to who you were in March 2020. 🙋🏻
I don’t know about you, but the growth and discoveries I’ve made during this past year have been wild, and I’d love to capture some of that learning.
So, here are my lessons from 2020!
1. Thoughts and words matter a lot.
Like, a lot, a lot.
This was one of the first things I learned early on in the pandemic when I was struggling with a string of sad, unmotivated days. (Many thanks to my friend Lindsey for her wisdom and helping to pull me out of my funk.)
What I learned is thoughts and words influence feelings, which influence actions, which influence results. Which means my THOUGHTS were contributing to my bad days.
The best part of this lesson? Realizing that my thoughts are completely within my control...which means MY DAYS are within my control.
I spent the better part of this year rewriting my thoughts so that things like worrying, complaining, other people, and feelings of hopelessness didn’t get the best of me.
When I rewrote my thoughts and when I got careful with my words, I took back my power. When I focused on gratitude, the here and now, and life’s small beauties, my days became brighter.
The power of new thoughts and words—it allowed to finish making my Glacier paintings during the surreal month of March. Because I knew that no matter what, we need art and reminders that no valley lasts forever and we’re never, ever alone.
2. We don’t give ourselves enough credit.
We rarely (more like never) give ourselves enough credit for everything we’ve accomplished or how far we’ve come.
I can’t tell you how many times I wrote in my journal this year, “I feel like I haven’t done anything,” only to follow that up with a long list of things I actually HAD done. No matter how much I had accomplished, it never seemed like “enough.”
What I finally realized is this narrative was playing out in deeper, more destructive ways. What I was really saying was that I wasn’t enough. Which is never, ever true.
You are enough—always. Just as you are.
I recommend making a list of 30 things you’re proud of yourself for accomplishing this year. I did this at my friend Karolina’s advice, and it was so, so powerful!
Your list can include anything, big or small. And don’t stop at 20. Go aaaaall the way to 30.
For some inspo, here are some of mine:
I am proud of creating and releasing my Glacier Collection—during COVID!
I am proud of our spontaneous summer road trip out West.
I am proud of finally launching prints!
I am proud of all of the journaling I did this year.
I am proud of noticing when I was stressed, and taking steps to feel more like myself.
I am proud of the connections I made with others.
I am proud of getting my first real Christmas tree.
I am proud of saying “no” when I didn’t want to do something.
I am proud of being bold enough to ask for what I want.
I am proud of becoming kinder.
3. It is OK to quit something.
Preferred, even.
I quit something pretty significant this year, which is very unlike me. It was something I thought I wanted and something I was ecstatic to commit to in March.
But do you know what? Things change. I changed. I got exactly what I was looking for, just not through this thing that I thought was the solution.
The lesson here? Stay open to possibility. And when something no longer feels right, don’t be afraid to admit it.
As one of my good friends Chelsea says, you are not a quitter. 🙂 You are YOU. So be you, unapologetically. And cut off anything that dulls your brightness.
4. The Universe always gives you exactly what you need.
…and never more than you can handle. (Although it didn’t always feel like that this year.)
One of the things I’ll remember most from 2020 is the morning I woke up at 6:22, eight minutes before my alarm was scheduled to go off and less than a week after we had moved into our new house, only to walk into my sunroom and be there as my 16-week-old kitten died.
It was one of the most painful things I have experienced in my life. Part of me was glad that I was there, so she didn’t have to be alone. But part of me was also angry.
Why cut her life short like that? Why bring her into our lives only to take her away two months later? Why was this one of the first memories in our new house?
I woke up at exactly 6:22 two more mornings that week. I could feel the Universe trying to tell me—I was supposed to be there, for whatever reason. I was supposed to wake up early and be there as it happened.
Something entirely unrelated was discouraging me yesterday, and I said, “Man, I really need ____.” And do you know what happened today? I got a Facebook message from someone that filled the very need I had asked for.
We don’t always get what we think we need or what we ask for on our timeline—and we don’t always realize that we’re getting what we need as it happens. But I’ve seen it happen time and time again.
Everything happens for a reason if we open our eyes and trust enough to see it.
5. The small things are the best things.
Things at our fingertips, like:
Picking wildflowers in a field
Nightly rituals like watching the sun set
Dance parties in the kitchen.
Long drives in the country.
And things further away, like:
Dinner with friends.
The scent of your dad’s cologne.
The dimples on each other’s cheeks.
I spent so much time this year on my back porch watching the sun set. In retrospect, it’s one of those nightly rituals that I hope to never forget. Just taking the time to breathe and let gratitude and joy wash over me as I witnessed the ever-changing colors of the sky.
I’m looking forward to the day when things go back to “normal.” But my hope is I won’t stop noticing the little things, even when the big things come back into focus. I want to keep looking up at the sky.
6. No valley lasts forever.
There are always peaks, aka better days, ahead.
I thought about this metaphor a lot while creating my Glacier Collection, inspired by my time hiking in the northern Montana wilderness.
When you’re hiking, it’s easy to feel like you’re going to be stuck on an uphill climb forever. But you never are. There are peaks and valleys always, just as in life.
Much of this year has felt like a valley. Things have been hard for any number of reasons, but the good news is the valleys don’t last forever. Brighter days are coming.
And, you can’t have the peaks without the valleys. If we didn’t have the valleys, we wouldn’t realize the full beauty of the peaks.
I think this is why my paintings are always a little raw and gritty—because I want them to be reminders that you can’t have the beauty without the mess.
7. The process matters just as much as the destination.
Put another way: You are not what you achieve, and your achievements won’t make you happy.
So many good things happened to me this year. But I didn’t always savor their goodness.
More often, I actually choked out their joy, which is so silly. Because isn’t joy the whole point of good things?
I took some time yesterday to plan for 2021, and I’m taking a radical approach to goal setting next year. I’ve set three big goals that I’m turning over to the Universe, and the rest of the year? I’m focusing on the process and how life feels. And I’m trusting that the results will just happen.
My goal for 2021? To feel authentic, connected, excited, purposeful, and powerful, and to help you do the same.
8. I am strongest when I am me. You are strongest when you are you.
Some changes are coming to how I share my work with the world in 2021. I realized recently that I’ve been spending so much time trying to fit into a box that I forgot how much power there is in being different—in being wholly and authentically yourself.
I’ve been spending the last few weeks gathering my thoughts, and I can’t wait to begin sharing them with you in January.
I’ve mustered up (or perhaps I am mustering up😅) the courage not to hold anything back, and to chase the wildest of wild ideas. Get ready for it! It’s going to be so bold and so good.
9. Fear is a map. Run towards it, not away from it.
Here’s a little secret: There’s no such thing as being fearless.
What we think is fearlessness is actually people staring down their fear and doing the scary thing anyway. And it’s only through doing the scary things that the big things happen.
Like initiating a two-person art show.
Like sharing my love of painting with a group of my peers by teaching a workshop.
Like bringing my artwork to a new city.
Like saying yes to a solo exhibition.
Like investing in myself through coaching and education.
Like taking a leap and going on a two-week road trip out West.
Like messaging people I wanted to connect with.
Like buying and selling a house...during 2020 of all years!
All of these things were scary at one point or another, and I could have let fear stop me. But instead, 2020 was my best year yet.
Because fear is a map, and I ran towards it.
Because I listened to my intuition nudging me to take leaps of faith.
10. Crazy ideas are not crazy.
There were so many times this year that I said, “Wouldn’t it be crazy if...”
And for some reason, more often than not, I decided to act on those hunches.
I realized that me calling the ideas “crazy” was really me being afraid of rejection—of other people not responding or saying no.
But guess what happened? Almost every time I acted on a “crazy” idea, it worked out in my favor. And I got some big rewards for taking the small risk of rejection!
I’ve started to see these “crazy ideas” as divine inspiration telling you to go in a certain direction— to have the courage to try something.
You never know what will happen when you do!
11. The power of journaling.
Never could I have guessed what all 2020 would have in store.
Early in the year, I committed to free-writing three pages in my journal every morning, and boy, am I glad I did.
It’s been amazing these last few weeks looking back through my journals and remembering all that has happened and all that I have learned this year.
That’s actually where most of these lessons came from—the journals. Because journaling forced me to stop and think and process rather than push aside and ignore.
12. You already have all of the answers.
You don’t need to look to others to tell you what to do. You already know.
Next year, I’m letting go of a lot of things, but here are a few: Second-guessing myself. Comparison. Over-analyzing. Saying yes to anything that doesn’t fire me up.
Say it with me: When I get quiet and turn inward, I already have all of the answers. I am best when I am 100% me.
2020–I’ll remember you for so many things. The high highs and the low lows.
Happy New Year, friends! Let’s make it an especially good one. ✌️